A game: you are confronted by two men. One is walking around with a phone app that let’s him brag to his friends after he “scores.” The other is totally supportive of women and thinks they have been historically oppressed—and also that they continue to oppress themselves by showing cleavage and not reporting sexual assaults. Which one is the misogynist? Did you guess both? You’re so good at this game!

But let’s break down our contenders.

First up is: the creep at Pepsi who made this ridiculous AMP energy drink phone app. It’s actually all rather self explanatory—the geniuses behind AMP UP Before You Score were quite clear:

Here’s how it works:

1. Identify Her Type
Got your eye on a girl, and aren’t sure how to get started? Pick out her profile, flip the card, and study up quick with a cheatsheet on the stuff she’s into, with lists, links and some surefire opening lines. (Surefire to what, we won’t say.)

2. Keep a List
Get lucky? Add her to your Brag List. You can include a name, date and whatever details you remember.

3. Brag
You got it? Flaunt it. Keep your buddies in the loop on email, Facebook or Twitter.

Thanks to AMP, you have a handy list of female types from which to choose when trying to identify the PERFECT way to approach your conquest (and really, that’s all she is—a sexual conquest you can brag to your boys about after you SCORE). These include the Artist, the Sorority Girl, the Nerd, the Rebound Girl, and the Foreign Exchange Student. I wonder if I would be the Bookworm or the Indie Rock Girl? Probably I would get pegged as the Women’s Studies Major. I should download this app and find out!

Clearly I’m a bit sarcastic this morning, so I’ll let Hortense of Jezebel get serious on the matter:

There’s a reason why I go after bro culture as often as I do: things like this, which are completely unacceptable and ridiculously offensive. This is a program sponsored by a major corporation that encourages men to look at women as objects to be won, used, and tossed away after a “victory” is obtained, and the more normalized things like this becomes, the worse off we’re all going to be.

Well said. Apparently, Pepsi has apologized already, but the app is still for sale, making their apology pretty meaningless. Way to go. (h/t Feminsite)

Contender number two is this guy. [Linked videos may be triggering in terms victim-blaming, as well as my following explanation.] He calls himself Onision, and he has a bunch of videos on youtube and on his website where he shares his illuminating views on all sorts of topics. Guys like this are a dime a dozen on the internet, but he’s getting attention here (and thus he wins, unfortunately, because isn’t that the point of his making these videos) because of his lovely views on women and rape. I came across video number one on the (Wo)Men Speak Out blog, where one writer and survivor is appropriately infuriated by this dude, who spends 2 minutes and 13 seconds telling women that if they don’t report their rapes, they are effectively to blame for all other rapes and finishes with the lovely “How are we to not conclude that you wanted this all along, when you decided to just lay there and not resist, when you decided to not report the crime…it’s time to stand up for yourself, it’s time to stop complaining and start preventing.”

But wait, there’s more: not only are women to blame for rape, they are also to blame for continually being treated as sexual objects (by, say, guys like the AMP UP Before You Score creators) becuase they wear clothes that show off their breasts (or, “sacks of fat” as Onision would call them)! Onision has some “information for you about women’s history.”

For the last hundred years, women have been severely oppressed. [Ed. note: He's right, 200 years ago things were totally awesome for ladies!] And in this oppression women began to fight for their rights. These persistent and strong women fought so you could get a job, they fought so you could get paid equally, they fought so you could vote. And for so long they’ve been fighting so that men will begin to respect them, begin see them as equals. And what do you do? You show off your tits…Some of the women watching this video may think that I’m their worst enemy at this point, however you have it wrong. I’m the guy who believes that women should be in control of the world. I’m the guy who collectively has a greater respect for women than he ever will for men…but a lot of this you have to take a step at a time and the first step is obtaining your respectability by putting clothing on…Do not submit to these primitive and idiotic expectations of you…Society has taught you that you are weak but I am telling you that you are strong.

Well, thank God Onision is around to remind me that my intellect gives me more value than the sacks of fat on my chest! I AM strong! Quick, someone grab me a sweater to cover up so I can stop disrespecting the hard work of feminists past. Maybe if I dress demurely at all times, no one at Pepsi or any other company will ever exploit or profit from my body ever again! That is how it works, right? All these years when I was wearing v-necks because they were comfortable and I thought they looked good on me, and it turns out I was really just perpetuating a culture that doesn’t value women’s minds. I feel so ashamed.

So, two sides of the same coin: The bro who high fives his buddies after crossing the “Aspiring Actress” type off his must-score-with bucket list, and the “seriously you guys I am so pro-woman that I take midol once a month in solidarity so please stop acting like whores cause you’re making the rest of us look bad” creep. The douche and the savior. I don’t know which one I hate more.